Musings of an Old Fool: On writing

It is very interesting to me that for me, a person whose last year and next year will be very much focused on writing (papers, dissertation, reports, lecture notes, etc) and reading (homework, research papers, journal articles, etc), a relaxing hobby has become to write non-academic work.

I've always chalked it up to a passing fad, something I was doing just to while away some of the time...but I believe it is time to admit I may have a problem. :-) I recently did a bit of inventory, and between some autobiographical "memories" letters, prose, and a novel I'm in the middle of finishing, I have accumulated a lot more writing in the last 3.5 years than just "a passing fad". Depending on how one does their page counts, at last inventory I had between 400 and 600 pages of non-academic writing filling my "it's just a temporary fad" electronic ledgers. That number stunned me. Maybe not any of you who have been subjected to my overwrought verbosity, but it certainly did to me. It was like the "social smoker" who finally had to admit they were up to a pack a day...an eye-opener.

Another thing that has been extremely interesting to discover is exactly how this creative process works for me. I have long been a fan of Stephen King, and enjoyed just about anything he's ever written. When I have read his own essays on writing, and listened to interviews and missives he has from time to time released, as well as included in some of his fiction, he makes it very clear that he does not often (if ever) feel in control of the writing process. He seems to often describe it as somewhat of a spectator sport for him...he's writing a story, but it's almost because he's writing down something he's observing, and not necessarily planned and outlined out ahead of time.

The idea had always intrigued me, but to be perfectly honest, I had summarily chalked it up to "artistic exaggeration". After all, one does not really ghostwrite as he described, right? I mean, that was more the realm of fairy tales and bad horror movies...not real life.

And yet, after finding myself smack dab in the middle of a growing pile of words, I come to the realization of exactly how RIGHT he is. Almost all of my non-academic work that I end up writing down and either blogging, posting in a note, or filing away for my own eyes only, is very, very close to a first draft rough. I tend to move slowly through the writing (1-5 pages per writing session on my novel, for example, and spaced apart by days or months), but that's because of the constant pauses to "observe" what the characters are doing, and where this is going.

Most of the stuff I finish, and even post, follows the same pattern:

Put on some music (I can't work in the deafening world of just words in my own head without damping them out with the focusing effect of external stimuli...but I use music instead of TV because of the visual distraction from the TV)

Write it slowly, correcting words, usage, and structure within the current sentence only...rarely going back to revise the previous one(s).

Spell-check (not always thoroughly effective... :) )

Read through once to make sure I haven't made any glaring faux pas that will annony the living crud out of me later.

Put it aside to store or post later.

I find that if I spend too much time going back through and revising, I get lost in the changes, and they become eternally recurrent. It also seems to lose some of the original flow and idea. It seems...almost tarnished or dulled...a weird way to describe it, I know, but it's as best as I can describe the feeling of working over the writing too much.

A benefit of this "first draft" approach is that very, very, very often, my own writing is new and surprising to me if I go back and read it later. I am sometimes pleasantly surprised, and at times frustrated with myself for not writing it differently. More often than not, however, this latter feeling comes from having grown in experience and writing style from attacking other projects in the interim.

But of all these projects, the novel has been the clearest indicator of the Stephen King effect in full-force. Every time I think I have a section all planned out, I'll get to writing it, and realize that this is not really what is going on...the writing changes on the spot, and I'm usually happy with the result. I am almost as surprised by my own tale at this point than an outside reader would be. I say almost, because I have a vague idea of where the over-arching story arc is headed...but each time I write some more, my certainty in the direction and contents of that arc fuzz up just a little more. And I'm not sure that the idea stems more from the plot prediction any movie-goer or reader may do themselves when coming across a new story, or from really having an idea of where this will all end up.

I must admit, however, that this third-person perspective in the creative process does somewhat attempt to dull the personal satisfaction in the work done...after all, I often feel like more of a reporter than a creator. And yet, even this is not enough to dampen how cathartic and relaxing this hobby can be.

Fact is, I enjoy it just for the sake of doing it. That I put some of it out there in the wide world of the web is merely to share some of that with my friends and family...but so far the store of what I keep to myself or very close to myself is growing as large or larger than that which I have let out...and I'm comfortable with that. :)

So, writing, writing, and writing it will be. Dissertation and papers for work, and missives, prose, and fiction to relax. It's a good thing I renewed my enjoyment of Aikido...or I could very well never have a reason to leave a desk. :)

Musing accompanying this latest episode of single-pass ghostwriting:

From: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fDQS1bFgjN8